Hello, I'm Chrissie. I can't get over how lucky I am to be living at the seaside - I still love living at Cleveleys after being here for more than 15 years. I hope you enjoy my slightly cock-eyed look at life - come back regularly for a look at living beside the seaside, our mad family life and my view on local and topical current affairs. The weather often features, along with the very different things that you get to see and do when you live somewhere like this.

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The Pipe Cometh

The outfall pipe is here so if you want to see it you'd better be quick!

There we were just having finished our lunch yesterday, when all of a sudden Kevin jumped up and ran to the window as though he’d seen somebody on fire, heaven forbid, but no, he thought he’d seen signs of the pipe that is coming to United Utilities at Anchorsholme.

You can read about the outfall pipe project here

Outfall pipe being fabricated

Without another word, up jumped Jane and Derek, ran for the binoculars and started scanning the horizon. I must say, I didn’t know they could all move so fast, it just goes to show what they can do when they are excited.

I just carried on doing my bit of after-lunch colouring, although I have to admit even for me it is a very fascinating thing to do and see, bringing a two mile long pipe by sea from Ireland don’t you think. If you just try and imagine how far you would have to walk to cover a mile and then double it, that gives you an idea of how long it is. It's three quarters of a mile from our house to Cleveleys, so that gives me some idea in my minds eye of what the total length could be.

Jane thought just one boat was pulling it while Kevin and Derek said three, it must be a mighty good Captain is all that I can say, just imagine moving such a long thing through the seas with the winds we’ve been having, I bet it looked like a zig zag snake by the time they’d done don’t you! I know that it has set off from Ireland so is somewhere between here and there, well it would be wouldn’t it dopey me, but Jane said there was some talk of it turning up at night so I’ll have three adults to stop crying if they miss it after all the looking forward to it that’s been going on in our house!

Outfall pipe arrives at 7pm on Tuesday 8 August

Update: At about 7pm last night, Tuesday, the convoy had moved left along the horizon (above) and were parallel with the job on the shore.

Marilynne Tomlinson, who lives at Norbreck, posted this photo (below) on my Facebook page last night. She's a bit higher up there and you can see the pipe clearly in her photo.

Pipe arrives, photo Marilynne Tomlinson

We all said that we bet they were going to do it overnight, and when Jane got up at the crack of dawn today, lo and behold, it was in place. So if anyone wants to see it, you need to get your skates on and get there early Weds morning 9 August before it's sunk into the sea bed and is gone from plain sight forever. 

The Mysterious World of the Supermarket

Derek had to go for some blood tests yesterday morning as well as having to fast for them so the poor thing went without food from the night before until he got back, ahhhhh. He didn’t seem to be two minutes before he was back so as they’d done a decent job of fetching the supermarket shopping last week, ahem (that was a cough) we volunteered them to do it yesterday, so Derek came home for some breakfast and off they popped when his equilibrium was restored.

I had carefully written a list and gone through it with him to make sure he understood it, and ringed the quantities again, as last week they seemed to get confused with the difference between one and two things and still managed to get it wrong and leave things off the list.

Sure that he knew what my scribblings were, although I had written 1 with a circle round it for 1 orange, he couldn’t understand what that was even though I thought it was quite obvious. I didn’t want an orchard bringing back, I just wanted 1 orange. Anyway, when they had stoked their boilers off they went into the mysterious world of the supermarket.

It got to 11.10am and I was starting to wonder if they’d been abducted by aliens, when back they came. I asked where on earth they’d been all that time thinking they’d called at their favourite (Lidl) but they’d popped into ‘somewhere’, a secret I think, bet it was Lidl as they can’t go anywhere near the place without a giant magnet pulls them in, but I still don’t know. Their story was that my supermarket hadn’t got the fresh in-store soft baked loaf that I wanted and they'd gone trying to find one ‘somewhere’ else but having failed that, I got an ordinary sliced loaf, mmmmm.

I had asked them to call at the pharmacy counter to get some cream, not the one you eat, to use on your body in case anyone is wondering. (Actually, for those of you who are medically minded it's for Muffin, the dog, who has an auto-immune condition that causes a skin condition that the vet told us to buy anti-fungal cream for). I wrote a full description of the tube, pale blue, the size of the tube and a large one of the shops own brand along with the price, £7 something, but the big one lasts longer I explained. Bearing in mind it was all written down with the active ingredient WRITTEN IN CAPITAL LETTERS, what they brought back was a small tube, very small, in a PINK box which of all things was to cure Thrush.

Now neither Muffin nor I have got Thrush, and having asked why I needed this totally unrelated tube of cream when it was all clearly written down, he said that the woman behind the counter had given it to him and it did contain the same ingredient. ‘Yes’ I said, 'but I wanted a big blue boxed tube not an itsy-bitsy pink tube for Thrush which cost me nearly as much as the large ‘proper’ tube', so after we’d all had a good laugh, except Derek, I put the offending tube away.

Jane has a what we call her 'brown purse' where she keeps her supermarket money in (separate to her 'normal' purse which is like a shopping bag), so when we were having lunch, I asked Kevin if he’d got the purse out at the cash till, a small woman’s purse, in front of the cashier. To this he said, ‘yes, what would you have done you would have got the purse out’. ‘Yes I said but I’m a woman, or I was the last time I looked which is OK, but I didn’t think you’d want to be seen at the till with your purse’ it’s just not like him. It's a small, battered leather one, so at a glance it could look like a mans I suppose, ish, if you were half looking...

After all the leg pulling I think I’ll have to tread carefully to get them to go again but as I told them, I was really really grateful that they had gone!

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Published: 9th August 2017
Modified: 9th August 2017